Skate Camp Day 3 - Go Big or Go Home.

So today Ry's skate Instructors informed me that he feels that learning the fundamentals are boring, and he wants to do the "big stuff." Those who have known me and my husband from childhood will probably find this funny...and somewhat reeking of karma. I guess the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree.

Mind you, this kid won't really skate down a small incline by himself yet, but in his mind, he's ready for the big time.

Here's another skill he can actually do himself...

We will be investing in Super-sized amounts of ice packs, children's tylenol and gauze.

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Skate Camp - Day One

This week marked one of the most anticipated camps of our Summer, Skateboarding Camp! Society Skate Shop in San Carlos runs this camp through the Redwood City Parks and Recreation Department (a little shameless self promotion...from me, Leslie Knope) I also have to mention that this camp took no encouragement or bribery to get him to go, just an investment on our part for the right equipment...coupled with a zillion..."You'd better REALLY want this" since equipment-wise, we were starting from scratch.

The Skatepark itself is awesome. It was constructed with a lot of input from local skaters and named in memory of one of Redwood City's resident Pro Skaters, Phil Shao, who passed away in 1998 by way of an auto accident.

Big daunting bowls, rails, stairs, you name it. Ry is just psyched to learn to conquer the flat, but did spend a good part of lesson one learning how to fall "correctly" sliding down the sides of the giant bowl. His pads already look as if they have been annihilated by a full season of X Games training.

Here are a couple of pics from Day One... And a Vid. I'm totally impressed by how much they taught him in one day - he even rode down the stairs, solo!

Ramp assistance.

Learning to ride fakie in the big bowl!

First injury... "belly burn." I was also told that he got a "shark bite" that day. He was a champ and told me "I got hurt, but it didn't stop me from skateboarding." Attaboy.

Maybe someday he'll star in the sequel.

Until then...to be continued...

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Rite of Passage

At my son's School, there is a tree. In that tree is a tree house. Now, you may think, "oh how cute and fun." Then you see the giant Oak.

Dangerous, you say? Well, let me preface this entry by saying that the methodology around these parts is, "If you can do it, then you CAN do it." No one should be doing this feat if they need help, a boost, and so on. It's all about you, your confidence and your upper body strength, of which it seems small kids have at a disproportionate rate. I cannot even haul myself across the monkey bars these days!

What I love about this treehouse is what it stands for. The kids try tirelessly to climb up the wrecking ball to reach "Stage one," gaining confidence as they contemplate stage two. Through their own creativity, they then find their way up a rope or inch up by using loose tree bark as foot-holds. Usually, we see 7th graders up at the top, while the younger kids struggle to just find a way up the wrecking ball. From the moment these children start school, this is the goal, a rite of passage, a must-archive moment prior to 8th grade graduation.

Today at Summer Camp, I watched as a bunch of soon-to-be first graders made it past stage one, stage two and so on. As I said, I love the tree, but not sure my blood-pressure is ready for this...

So.... I'll just keep reminding Ry to look down every now and then, and make it very clear that he is on his own getting himself out of the tree. He has made it to the first branch - which I will refer to as "Stage 2"- but I am not ready for the rest.

 

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A Funny Thing Happened...

Today at School Pick-up I was presented with a "must share." The teachers were laughing very hard and were saying how this moment of hilarity would potentially be shared at the next faculty meeting.

Important to note: Frank, Camerina and Kate are all of Ry's teachers. "Zephyr" is a kid that he tends to like to "throw under the bus" so to speak. I love Z's mother, so I am hoping to see this trend end. Funny thing is... they play together at school sometimes, but I think they both refuse to admit to liking one another. Anyway....

The kids were asked to draw a picture of something memorable from their field trip to the San Mateo History Museum. Ry was very interested in the Indian Teepee that was partially covered by twigs and mud.

Then, they asked Ry to dictate to his teacher what is happening in this picture...

There is no recollection from Frank or Kate of this occurrence.

That's all.

Incentivize It!

Sometimes, the idea of doing something new for a 6 year old can be daunting. Riding a 2 wheeler bike was not anything our oldest son was remotely interested in doing. WE, on the other hand, really needed him to be able to ride for various reasons. After a lot of pumping-him-up and conversations that sounded like an episode of some feel-good educational show, i.e. "You can do ANYTHING if you...", we arrived at the "I might try point." Then, Daddy said the magic phrase...

"Ryder, if you ride a 2 wheel bike without training wheels, I will buy you ANY Lego set you want."

Whoa. That was the offer of all offers. Now, of course my mind instantly went into panic, thinking about how this offer could materialize. I mean, for a measly $400, you can buy the Ultimate Collector's Millennium Falcon. Of course, Ryder's eyes lit up at this offer, and so the quest began.

We went to a local schoolyard that gave us a lot of blacktop to practice on, with a great falling radius. Ryder tried very cautiously yesterday to make it happen, but could not commit to consistent pedaling and focusing on what was in front of him- as opposed to to what my "other" hand was doing behind him. He was very upset at the end of the day that he couldn't get some kind of secondary prize for trying...but we stood firm, and the Lego carrot dangled on.

This morning, we were met with an uncharacteristic suggestion that we try again today. The determination was challenged a bit, but with a little encouragement, we arrived here...

We then journeyed to Toys R Us, where we got off easy with one Harry Potter Hogwarts set and one Ninjago Skull Truck. Hopefully, he'll want to ride again...for fun.

Happy Pokétine's Day

{Squirtle the Turtle}

This year, Ry elected to have Pokémon Valentine's Day Cards. In typical Freeman fashion, we made them ourselves, at 7pm, the night before the class celebration. Last year was Angry Birds - and those were completely made by Andy, a la Graphic Designer Extraordinaire - and were AMAZING. This year, since it's Kindergarten, Ry had to pony-up and join in.

When you're 6, writing your name 18 times is a daunting task and clearly not one you outgrow (see Mommy & Daddy's growing "thank you" card list from 2010 through 2011). He did it though, and added his own flair to each signature. If you were unsure if our child could write, he made sure to prove it on his teacher's cards, which were all carefully penned. His friends did not receive the same precision, but more gusto...a "Y" like a tree, a microscopic "r" etc.

The other daunting task was for us. As a new, intensely obsessed, member of the Pokémon Fan Club (his fave is "Squirtle" who has the power of- wait for it- squirting), it was extremely important that each child in his class was represented with the "right" Pokémon. We tried to narrow it to 3, but you know how that goes. I searched the web, for not only the appropriate Pokémon, but one in the correct "pose."  Here's sample of the kid-homemade/parent-made outcome.

Now to explain to some of the girls' parents, why our son gave their daughters a picture of a stomach and large intestines. (It's a Pokémon, People! - #2 on the bottom row.).

Kids say...

Yesterday, my father, or "Boppa", as Ry has named him, came down to visit for the annual family holiday party. In common grandpa fashion, my dad approached Ry with the giant proverbial *I-haven't-seen-you-in-so-long*, hug. 

Ry's response...

"WOW! That was a really strong hug for an old man."

Sheesh. Happy Holidays.

What A Boy Wants

Hello Blogesphere! This Mom has been incredibly swamped and has clearly skipped over some monumental times in our family's 2011 history. For example, Ryder started Kindergarten this year, then there was the infamous Venus Fly Trap costume for Halloween, and so on and so forth. I believe for the next couple of entries, I will be skipping around a bit...you know, to keep life interesting. Just to stay relevant, and to make me feel like I am on top of things, I'll recap yesterday...

 

Grandma Bevy invited us to the Hyatt Regency for Breakfast with Santa. Sadly, I think it was the first time either of our kids had actually sat on Santa's lap...not sure why, but I have a feeling that Daddy & Mommy's crowd-aversion-illness is to blame. Regardless of their lack of practice, these two little people had no problem climbing into the Jolly Old Man's Lap and rattling off their wishes. 

Santa: Hayden, what would you like for Christmas

Hayden: A Pirate

Santa: And...

Hayden: A crocodile trap

Santa: Um, okay... that might be tough. Anything else?

Hayden: Candy

We had to later explain that a certain unwelcome house guest and one non-approved-by-Peta item would be a tad hard to come by.  He's 2...he may forget he asked anyway...although Candy seems to be a recurring request.

Now, it was Ry's turn.


Mommy: Ry, it's your turn to tell Santa what you want for Christmas.

Ry: (in his best "he should already know" voice) Well, I already circled it all in the catalog.

Santa: Ho Ho Ho! What would you like for Christmas... 


How much time do you have?

Anatomy of a Ride Home From Swim Lessons

 

We were driving along today and I pulled up next to an SUV, like one we are considering buying for our next car. This conversation ensued...

Me: Ry, look to your left, that is one of the SUVs that Daddy wants to get.

Ry: You mean that one over there?

Me: Yes

Ry: with a hint of annoyance Why does Daddy want that car!? I want a minivan!

Me: Why?

Ry: It has a TV.

Me: An SUV can have a TV too.

Ry: But I want a sliding door.

Me: Why?

Ry: I dunno. Kate's has a TV.

Me: When will you watch TV in the car?

Ry: On long trips, or I can use my screen time on the way to school.

Me: If we get a TV it will only be used for long trips. Anyhow, Daddy would never own a minivan.

Ry: Why?

Me: Because it doesn't do what Daddy wants it to do.

Ry: What's that?

Me: Lots of things.

Ry: Well, I want a TV.

Me: We're not getting a minivan.

Ry: I'm hungry what do you have?

Me: I have a car to take us home to the refrigerator...

Ry: No Mom, what small objects do you have?

Me: A cell phone and a wallet. You want to eat that?

Ry: No....get my flip flop or I won't love you anymore.

Me: Ry, number one, I am driving, two, that was very disrespectful, I won't get you anything if you talk to me like that.

Ry: Can you get my flip flop, please?

Victory.

All I Need...

A friend of mine recently posted on Facebook about her 3 year old daughter's need to try on a zillion outfits to then proceed to change them a billion more times. It reminded me of Ry getting ready for school. Here are his rules:

Mom, please have the grace to accept with serenity the things that I cannot change, Courage to not change the things which should be changed, And the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.

1. I will only wear black or navy t-shirts
2. Nothing with Jack Skellington on it (I now hate him)
3. I will only wear shorts
4. Flip flops or Crocs, I hate socks.
5. My Chinese Silk Pajama Top from Grandma Bevy is always appropriate as a jacket.
6. I will take as long as I want to do these things, no matter if we have 30 minutes or 2 minutes to do them in.

In addition to getting dressed, more often than not, he would somehow need to take something with him to school. He used to stuff a magnet into his pocket, a junky plastic toy, a puzzle piece, etc. As he has matured, it launched into a book, a transformer or a "Go Go." Said object would likely hit his cubby, only seconds after entering school, thus making the motive unclear at best. No matter what, it would command a tedious visit to the toy bin in the corner of his bedroom and some rifling around for some time, only to find that perfect "thing." There was never a real plan for which item was going to be selected, RIGHT AS WE'RE TRYING TO LEAVE THE HOUSE... as if the act of getting dressed was not enough of an arduous task. I am sure there will come a day when I miss these little quirks, but in the throws of it, you are not always thinking about how interesting or cute something is, just about how the heck you are going to get out of the house. BUT, I think we are at the tail end of this ritual.

Daddy says Ry reminds him of Steve Martin in The Jerk. "All I need"... makes us laugh every time.

Happy Sunday.

Joke courtesy of Hailey Ritchey

High Five 

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Down Low

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Cut the Pickle

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Tickle Tickle

YouTube, My Savior.

When times are tough, parents lean on technology. GUILTY. My newest bail-out is my Droid. I have the You Tube app, and it is turning into my favorite one. One day I searched Dr. Seuss and found that almost every book has some Scholastic book/movie/cartoon/video thing. When I am in a jam...it's Green Eggs and Ham. 

This morning, Ryder was watching the ZAKS. When it ended I came over, only to realize he was now watching Fox in Socks. What? How did he get there? Oh, a finger swipe on YouTube and a tap to select. Yes, he can control it now. I felt amazed by this.

Thank you Dr. Seuss. We acknowledge you daily. We have about 15 of your books and Ryder has many of them memorized.

Mommy? What's the word....

This past November, Andy and I returned from a night out with the kids. As we were settling in, I heard something muttered from over by the ottomans that was fairly, unsettling.... "Fuckin Kids!"

What what what? It was perfectly impersonated. A comment made from under his breath...not from my husband, but from my 4 year old! It sounded like Andy, in full frustration mode, leaving a room filled with preschool angst. Ryder captured it accurately, in an Oscar worthy performance, so organic and pure to its sound.

Now, from what we have learned as "good parents" (ignore the FK statement, right?) we know not to make a big deal about words. This only encourages the performance. In an effort to diagnose, and okay, I admit, selfishly, maybe, hear that phrase again, I inquired.

Me: Ryder, I am sorry, what did you say? Did you ask me something? I just didn't hear you...

Ryder: *Silence*

Me: Ryder? It's okay, what did you say?

Ryder: silently fucking *dramatic pause* kids? Yes, even he was questioning it's validity.

So, we realize that the pause meant he KNEW he had said something taboo. I appreciate that. I also understand, we as parents slip-up.  Don't worry, we are paying for it. It has not been forgotten. Now Ryder's new game is LET'S GET MOMMY TO SAY THE F-WORD. As we approached Thanksgiving (you'll see why this is important to note), this conversation erupted:

Ryder days later: Mommy? what's the word that rhymes with duckin?

Mommy: OOOOOH, you must be referring to a Turduckin! Yes, Ryder, it's when you stuff a chicken into a duck, into a turkey! Crazy right? Lame cover-up, I know.

Ryder: not the right answer in his mind No Mommy, what's the BAD word that rhymes with duckin?

So basically, I get this question every other week it seems. Sometimes he goes as far as saying things out-of-the-blue like "Mommy, my teacher says the word that rhymes with Duckin all the time." *sigh* Don't judge.

Duck You.

Insult.

 

Ryder has recently gotten heavily into teasing-by-chanting.... you know, repeating yourself over and over. Here was his offense last night...

Ryder: You are a lawyer, you are a lawyer, you are a lawyer!

Me: Do you know what a Lawyer is?

Ryder: No

Case dismissed.

My New Name Is...

JACOB.

This is what Ryder has chosen for his new moniker. He also changed Hayden's name, mine and Daddy's. Ryder has really streamlined our family. When you see any of us from now on...it's Jacob. Makes it easy. (no, we don't let him watch LOST. He's 4. I am not that crappy of a parent.)

When I was in Kindergarten, I hated my name and changed it to Kathy. I wrote it on all of my artwork. I used to draw "Spider's on Roller Skates"...or at least Kathy did.  She still hangs out with me from time to time. She ate some Girl Scout cookies with me last night. I had none.

This is how I gauge that  Ryder's behavior is normal, because I am normal.

No Refunds After 90 Days

At lunch today, out of nowhere, Ryder strolls out of his room (yes, you heard me, it was lunchtime, and Ryder was not eating. Shocker.)

Ryder: Mommy, can you return babies?

Mom: what do you mean?

Ryder: Can we return a baby for another baby as cute as a baby whale?

Mom: What baby would we return? When you return something, you need to bring something back to the store before you get the new thing that you want.

Ryder: Silence.

Mom: What baby?

Ryder: Well, can we return Hayden for a baby as cute as a baby whale?

Mom: You want a baby whale?

Ryder: NO!... A.... BABY...AS...CUTE...AS...A...BABY...WHALE.

I guess I should tell him what happened at Sea World... not cute.

Naked Mole Rats

For this story, you only need to know 3 things...

1. They are a little bit rat

2. They are a little bit mole

3. They are all naked

We have read this book 5 times a day for the past 2 days. Another masterpiece by Mo Willems. Buy it. Naked Mole Rat Gets Dressed.

Ry's Irish Blessing...

A long time ago, when the Earth was green
There was more kinds of animals than you've ever seen
They'd run around free while the Earth was being born
And the loveliest of all was the unicorn... 

click for more lyrics 
Had no idea Shel Silverstein wrote this...makes me love it even more!

or just sit back and enjoy...

 

Ahh... one of my all time favorite Boston bar songs... I will not grace you with the hand gestures that accompany this. At least Ryder got his unicorn wish. Thank you Kate!

Brain-Hole

As I sat on the couch yesterday ignoring my children and fiddling on the laptop - writing yesterday's breathtaking blog entry- I was confronted with Ryder asking me to actually get dressed and leave the house. It was only 2pm...on a Sunday...in jammies...you see where this is going. 

Ryder: I want to go to Kate's House.

Me: Well, we can't just "go" to someone's house, we need to be invited, and we have plans later (well, way later...but what is time to a 4 year old?).

Ryder: Well... (see where he gets the "well"), I am going to get dressed and go to Kate's house.

That was when I started listening to his brain working outside of his body. His mouth became a transmitter, and I now had my material for today's blog. I decided I would just start typing, word for word, everything that spilled out of his mouth brain-hole. Please note- when you read this, remove all punctuation, then it will be verbatim.

I want to get dressed and see Kate. I want to play with her. I want to show her something she’s never done before. I want to put on the Unicorn costume and I am going to get dressed. I want to see what Kate’s house looks like inside. THEN I want to go upstairs and see what I already discovered. I don’t know…just those stuff. I want to go upstairs and look for the unicorn costume. Where’s the unicorn costume at Kate’s house, I feel like getting dressed and going to Kate’s house. Is Kate trying to put on the unicorn costume? She likes to, because she likes unicorn costumes a lot. Mommy, do you know where my clothes are, I feel like getting dressed. I don’t know how to listen, I don’t know what listening is, so I can’t listen. I don’t know any better.

*breathe* 

This reminded me of the monologue that "Sam" from "Leonardo the Terrible Monster" gives Leonardo about why he was "really" crying. Good book by your pal Mo Willems. Buy it, you'll like it. 

Deep Thoughts, by Ryder...

photos by Katy Scanlan

Reflecting on my son's randomness on this rainy Sunday. Oh how I wish I had written more down... Bad Mother.

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"My head is full of wind from all of this thinking"

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In the spirit of discussing gardening at dinner...
Mary: I have a black thumb
Ryder: You have a black thumb and I have a blue toe.
(Ryder had a bruised toenail).

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Ryder put an eye patch on his head and said:
"Look at my Chanukah cap"

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Ryder: "Why does this house smell like boogers?"
Mom: because you have boogers in your nose and that's all you can smell?

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 Ryder and I got our signals crossed when discussing room decor. When asked about wanting a light on his night stand...foolish me...I was talking about a lamp...he was referring to a knight light.

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Ryder brought his piggy bank to me one day...
Ryder: Mommy, here is some money, I am going to buy an upstairs for our house at the store.
Mom: That's great Ryder, how much do you think that costs?
Ryder: 8 coins....in a row.

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Ryder's preschool teacher informed me that he learned a valuable lesson. As he ventured onto the playground in a yellow Cinderella dress and Adidas Superstars he exclaimed,
"It's hard to climb in a dress."