This past November, Andy and I returned from a night out with the kids. As we were settling in, I heard something muttered from over by the ottomans that was fairly, unsettling.... "Fuckin Kids!"
What what what? It was perfectly impersonated. A comment made from under his breath...not from my husband, but from my 4 year old! It sounded like Andy, in full frustration mode, leaving a room filled with preschool angst. Ryder captured it accurately, in an Oscar worthy performance, so organic and pure to its sound.
Now, from what we have learned as "good parents" (ignore the FK statement, right?) we know not to make a big deal about words. This only encourages the performance. In an effort to diagnose, and okay, I admit, selfishly, maybe, hear that phrase again, I inquired.
Me: Ryder, I am sorry, what did you say? Did you ask me something? I just didn't hear you...
Ryder: *Silence*
Me: Ryder? It's okay, what did you say?
Ryder: silently fucking *dramatic pause* kids? Yes, even he was questioning it's validity.
So, we realize that the pause meant he KNEW he had said something taboo. I appreciate that. I also understand, we as parents slip-up. Don't worry, we are paying for it. It has not been forgotten. Now Ryder's new game is LET'S GET MOMMY TO SAY THE F-WORD. As we approached Thanksgiving (you'll see why this is important to note), this conversation erupted:
Ryder days later: Mommy? what's the word that rhymes with duckin?
Mommy: OOOOOH, you must be referring to a Turduckin! Yes, Ryder, it's when you stuff a chicken into a duck, into a turkey! Crazy right? Lame cover-up, I know.
Ryder: not the right answer in his mind No Mommy, what's the BAD word that rhymes with duckin?
So basically, I get this question every other week it seems. Sometimes he goes as far as saying things out-of-the-blue like "Mommy, my teacher says the word that rhymes with Duckin all the time." *sigh* Don't judge.
Duck You.
